I have been an a frequent okcupid user for the past few years. I can’t even really remember why I decided to start using okcupid, but it has been a front runner for me for years. I had a lot of fun on the Tinder app and exploring the capabilities it had to offer. However I found a few bugs in the app that really started to get on my nerves, so I decided to explore other apps.
I used match.com for a short while about five years ago. I couldn’t really remember why I stopped using it, so I decided to give it another chance. After spending about 30 minutes putting together my match.com profile, it was approved, and the messages started flowing. However when I went to view these messages, I couldn’t because I was not a paying subscriber. I must have had a free trial before, and I forgot that was why it was free! I would have actually thrown down some money for this site, I liked a lot of what I had viewed so far, and I was anxious to talk to a few people. However their subscription pricing plans stopped me in my tracks…
- 6 months: $21.99/month
- 3 months: $24.99/month
- 1 month: $42.99/month
I know a lot of people say that when you pay-to-play you get a higher quality of potential matches. I don’t think I necessarily believe that to be true. Not to ‘toot my own horn’ but I think that I could be a great match for the right guy, but I am not willing to spend as much as $42.99/month to find him.
I decided to refocus my efforts, and look for a less expensive, preferably free alternative. When I first started online dating it was about five years ago. I have disappeared from the world from time to time when I am either in a relationship or fed up, but it all started about five years ago. The first dating site to pop my online dating ‘cherry’ was Plenty of Fish. I am sure that many of you have either heard of it, or have used it before. Plenty of Fish is very similar to okcupid, and it helps that it is free to use.
I started up a new profile on my phone and the initial setup process only took me about five minutes. I didn’t have time to really add a whole lot of information, but I posted a picture and a message letting people know I would add more later. Since I opened my account at 4:26pm eastern standard time, I have received over 100 messages. I haven’t even had the chance to update my profile. The app can’t handle uploading a photo and receiving a message at the same time, so there were issues there as well. Just to give you an idea, after reading through all the messages, within ten minutes I had this…
The messages keep coming in… I have seventeen new messages since I took that screenshot a half hour ago. Then of course there is my lonely match.com message from some poor guy who probably spilled his heart out, but because I am a cheapskate I will never know what he said…
However, I am well aware of what the men of Plenty of Fish have to say. They clearly haven’t read my blog…in their defense I haven’t posted a link yet. I was going to entertain you with a collection of the worst and best messages that I have received so far, however this app has a very hard time handling high traffic and it is proving to be quite the challenge. Plus my cat is in my writing space…
Most of the messages so far are a combination of the ‘Hey, how are you?’, ‘What’s up sexy?’, ‘Have you ever considered a sugar daddy type relationship?’, ‘Future wife.’, ‘Please message me’, and the list goes on…some messages were too vulgar to post in my blog. I try to keep this as PG-13 as I can. I am sure as the excitement of another fish in the pond wears off the messages will slow down. I have seen a lot of new faces on this app, I have also seen a lot of familiar faces as well.
I highly recommend to any of you trying online dating to make profiles on numerous sites. This expands your reach and gives you more options. You never know who you may find out there. And for those of you that think it is so easy being a pretty girl on these sites, you couldn’t be more wrong. More than half the messages I get are just men looking for ass, and the other half just liked the way I looked. There is a very small percentage of men who message me, that actually have taken the time to learn about me, and want more than just a one night stand. Furthermore, not every guy that I message will message me back, and sometimes they message me back to tell me bad news.
For example, today I messaged a guy on okcupid that I thought was handsome and very interesting. The first few initial messages were going very well and I was actually kind of excited. That was until he dropped a bomb on me, and informed me that he recently has been seeing someone and although he would be glad to be my friend, that was all at this time. Will I be this guys friend? I don’t know, maybe. I appreciate the honestly, but I know myself all too well, and it is really hard for me to be friends with men I find attractive.
We all get shot down, it happens. But by expanding your reach, exploring new opportunities you CAN find someone, or at the very least find a new friend. I will continue to use the POF app, along with okcupid and Tinder. If you see me out there, don’t be afraid to say hello!
What is your favorite online dating site/app? Are you willing to pay the prices to be on match.com and other pay-to-play sites? Have you also made good friends through failed dating attempts? I love your stories and I look forward to reading them! Thank you for reading and happy soul searching! xoxo